Miss H and Miss Y are a married lesbian couple both working for one of Taiwan’s l!9^KqwK+p)knJ0mLbB2LLlT9u2mTMnH3qfit8KLX8U$4nlR=VAargest airlines.
Both women are in the earlier 30s and grew up in Taiwan. These days, Miss H takes control of the plane at the front as a pilot, while Miss Y takes care of the passengers in theLC#sFNh-99yyTz!kd2vcIfW7)laPg#G$1VDROYi+QYxIVI4KUL back as a flight attendant
The pair met seven years ago when they joined the airline and, last year, they held their wedding last year. Theirs is a truly digital age romance full of Faceb%WI76^eG#ZRuJEO_Tk2BW4pPzt1DgRC2(H=y(fIP%%3cndoCv1ook antics and searching out Wifi.
Nowadays, they try to arrange short-haul flight shifts so they can spend as much of their time together as possible and look after their threZcnb)^jR-eCz)cT%K!hqr_TV6j&tIIo70&wH6vjUCCstJCenBxe bunny rabbits.
They told LaLaTai all about their love in the air.
How did you meet?
H: We were actually from the same batch of trainees. So we did our orientation on the same day, but we didn’t know each other. During my training, one of my classmates, a male pilot, added a bunch of flight attendants on my Facebook while I was in the toilet He was trying to use ==jY_=jsb^Spga^pyii50Hjtv$qCD!aa$_^IXgBguOn&Mxj-XEme as his wingman. It just happened that one of the people he added was Y.
From time to time, Miss Y would appear on my Facebook. I would like or comment on her posts. One day, I saw that she was flying to Jakarta and realized I FyKgsYY+!ZpwTczw)bMT++gLT7U*gg^[email protected]@Zuwould be on the same flight as her. I messaged to say we would be flying together. At breakfast, I was sitting alone.
Y: I asked if 2qLjEn1g!NNvVJPhy4TF_!_zTvyChEG&N2ND-yh1!+9C-63xFzanyone was sitting next to her and she said pilots are always alone.
H: We ended up talking for hours until the restaurant closed. In that Jakarta hotel, the pilots get free wifi in their room while the flight attendants use it in the crew lounge. I invited Miss Y up to my room to use the Wifi. But the Wifi stopped working that day. I joked that it was Mi[email protected]!V=EuGsiJZqR93*a_U!C1X$WQl&RAP2+ss Y that broke it and we just talked on the sofa.
That is how we became good friends. We kTW^fOK7a92%eDO!EMWE#[email protected])qlwyWUi=EYIcp9xEOYnew each other well for two years before we started our relationship. By the time we got together, we already knew each others deepest darkest secrets. We have a very transparent relationship.
How did you become romantically involved?
T4di#Z7h4Q_2L%j2k)Q)aUkxWG#rizRgO-OM2ujk=CiRMzi^4OMiss Y: I was on a trip to Osaka. A long-haul nine-day pattern in which I had three days in Osaka. I posted on Facebook to see if anyone was free and Miss H said she was free. I got a cold during the trip. She really looked after me those days. I felt very touched by what she did for me.
H: She continued her flight to NY, and I !v4Zhf0!jJllHm*@[email protected]$tp+7%HKNWsz^_kGdwent back to Taiwan. We started to go out more and we got closer and closer.
Y: One night, H was driving me home and I just couldn't stop myself. I wanted to tell her my feelings, so I told her I think I tHtV*gOi(vyYGg7#Ppl07G12B^1tC*oSncuSliVjR0olq%6Z8Pmight like her. She didn’t say anything, she was shocked. And I thought our friendship might be ruined.
H: She didn’t know I also had feelings for her. And then wG3kymo(1LN%#[email protected]%TwSzD8KVoh*v^s^wbhB7v_e talked it out the next day, we decided to be together.
How did the news go down at work?
H: We kept it secret in the UTEie=GEKf&_5%4KDCRSVqvMEpZUQgzLdGoin!UoFFh^bVUdilworking environment, not because we are gay, but because a lot of top management can be quite judgmental. There is a lot of gossip and a lot of scandals. So we decided to keep the relationship secret.
Actually our airline is very open. Many flight attendants are gay men. I feel quite lucky, I am open to most of our colleagues. Maybe some other captains are old and traditional. With them, I just try to not bring up the subject. Especially after Taiwan legalized same-sex marriage, with most people I talk about my wife. They usually respond with “oh, are you married?”.
People are very gossipy in aviation. After we got married, somehow the photos of the wedding were leaked and everyone was saying all so[email protected]([email protected]*TIg-oGrts of things about our relationship.
If anyone ever does ask about being in a same-sex relationship, I respond: “My mom doesn’t care, why do you care?”. My mom has always been my biggest supporter. Even before Taiwan legalized same-sex marriage. She was demanding rights for LGBT people. “If other people can have it, why can’t my daughter, too” she would say.
How did you propose?
H: I proposed in Paris under the Eiffel Tower. My sister studied in Paris, she is a pastry chef. And my mum was there too. They arranged a picnic under the Eiffel Tower. At 10 pm the lights begin to flash, anYlLrvnB_+Pr$&IPFQDVCB*mEFj4OR3Jmk27uCZ#8y*2d^NXEK%d that was the time I planned to propose. But, five minutes before that time it started to rain. So we all ran and hid under the tree.
My mom and my sister made t9tF*xK^ID_(EP$0-6cY*0FBRL+z#70&l#*H8FW=(EUeuK*a0JMheir excuses to leave and said they were going to find a restroom.
Y: I could tell they were going the wrong way.
H: They hid under another tree. I was standing behind Y and I got down on one knee. She turned around and saw me and started shouting “what are you doing?” “Why?’. I said, “I’m proposing”. I tried to say the words I prepared but I could only say “I’m proposing” and told her she had to say “yes”.
Y: At first, I just thought it was strange. I couldn’t believe we could get married. It wasn’t legal in Taiwan at that time. And, my parents really didn’t agree with the relations[email protected]@&7O+LxwjwFOw)sT!d#eXurNcMD#v#MdsEYp13qsilq$24B3hip.
How did you gain acceptance from your parents?
Y: When I first told them, they just shouted and we had a fiGACqOTBCr)Iry38*[email protected]*$I13tXfght. A huge fight. They said grandma will never approve it. "You will never be happy,” they said. When it came to introducing H, I was moody and down. I was worried my parents would beat her.
H: I was more of an optimist. I said they didn’t agree because they hadn’t met me yet. I’m a lovely person, I sa12TgO4Zjqca&O==+wcO2%6H3LY)FxkNn&a$c26rp_^W%8QGe%vid.
Y: My mum didn’t want them to know about the relationship. It was traditional thinking. She asked Lr+AIvx*YmoE1hOfRo#J#nXob5q+h4R-(F0HnaP=MbV3MXYhnYhow H could protect me in the future. We explained that we protect each other, it is equal. They had traditional thinking that a man needs to go to work and look after a woman.
When they met H they knew she has guts. They knew she could do better than most men in protecting me. During the referendum campaigns, my father saw that the anti-LGBT groups were using very silly reasonings to oppose same-sex marriage. “How can they be so stupid?” He asked. He saw that it didn’t make any sense and that’s how he became pro-LGBT. My brother and sister have also helped.
H: Although I am not close to my father, I invited him to the wedding. He walked up to Y’s father and asked how he came to agree with the marriage. Y’s f$i!rHOoRT7%I^p&lw^NRhqNAfZClu-Gobb0Bx&lYYd(8OU+HO$ather replied: “I love my wife, and my life likes H. It is because I love my wife and I love my daughter. And, H is a great person”.
What is your secret to a happy marriage?
H: We try to spend most of our time in TEHS6pPqxfdkBy^a)o2ecti3UcjbVEOutjCeo_7tS7q*sAgwz5Qaiwan. We both try to swap for short-haul flights so we can spend time together. Other couples may not be so lucky. Some of our friends in the industry have to deal with a lot of long flights, days away from home. It is very hard to maintain relations that way if you only see each other two days a week. We try to see each other every day.
We have three rabbits (one is n longer with us) to look after. Y has been a rabbit lover for a long time. She is very feisty, especially over animals and her family. I am the rational one.
(Feature Photo: Screengrab from Handsome Stewardess).